Muah! Ha! Ha!
- How do you define optimism? A banker who irons 5 shirts on a Sunday.
- Why are all MBAs going back to school? To ask for their money back.
- For Geography students: What’s the capital of Iceland? About Three Pounds Fifty.
- What do Icelandic banks and an Icelandic streaker have in common? Frozen assets.
- From a trader: “This is worse than a divorce. I’ve lost half my net worth and I still have a wife.”
- “I had a cheque returned earlier, says ‘Insufficient Funds’ – Mine or the bank’s?”
- There are 30 billion prime numbers below 700 billion. Rest are sub-prime.
- What’s the difference between an investment banker and a large pizza? A large pizza can feed a family of four.
- President Bush said clients shouldn’t be concerned by all these bank closings. If the bank is closed, just use the ATM, he said.
- George Bush said that he is saddened to hear about the demise of Lehman brothers… His thoughts at this time “go out to their mother as losing one son is hard but losing two is a tragedy.”
Note: Jokes are not mine they are in circulation on the Web at the moment; in fact I first saw them on my friends Facebook (a Financial Reporter 
)
7 Comments
October 29, 2008 at 12:33 pm
*giggles* I’m sending those to my ex-bank manager father, he’ll love them!
October 29, 2008 at 12:44 pm
I discovered your homepage by coincidence.
Very interesting posts and well written.
I will put your site on my blogroll.
October 30, 2008 at 9:48 am
These are funny! I love smart jokes hehe thanks for posting!
PS. I’m not a make up artist – I just Looooooove putting it on lol!
October 30, 2008 at 3:47 pm
Carm, thanks for posting these gags. As an old cabaret muso, I grew up on repertoire like this. This was nightly fare for us musos, between the endless bossa novas, Tom Jones covers and sight acts like jugglers, magicians and a woman who used to bend herself like a pretzel!
It’s great to hear the ‘up to date stuff’. Though I do have a couple myself.
My latest collection is about suicide bombers. If your stylish and erudite blog can cope, I have two rather cute ones about that particular issue. (Told you I’d wreak havoc!)
See, there is this suicide bomber, and he’s missed the bus he was targeting. So he runs after the bus, banging on the driver’s window. He yells, ’stop’, the bus driver looks through the window and shouts, why?’
‘Because it’s a matter of life or death!’
Another suicide bomber walks into a library and asks for a book on ‘How To Commit Suicide’, the librarian looks at him and says, ‘I can’t lend you a book about that’. He says, ‘Why not?’
‘Because you won’t bring it back!’
October 30, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Ah ahha hahahaaaaaaaaaaa… LMAO ~ You’re a cak Gigdiary!
February 26, 2009 at 8:13 am
These are really hilarious! Further they are short and sweet, and puts you to hang on the site!
June 26, 2009 at 9:27 am
Supertramps monsterhit from 1979 ” Breakfast in America” It´s now called “Broke fast in America”
Take a look at my hedge fund
It’s the only one I’ve got
Not much of a hedge fund
Never seem to yield a lot
Buy a subprime across the water
Like to own America?
Oregon and California
The bubble turned out to be true
But theres not a lot I can do
Could we avoid getting broke fast
Ben B. dear, Ben B. dear
Seems they did it in Texas
Cause’ everyones a millionaire
I’m a winner, I’m a sinner
Do you want my CDO
I’m a loser, so’s my broker
I was tempted, I couldn’t say no
But it turned out the high yield was low
Na. na, na, na, natten na, natten na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, natten na, natten na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, naaaa, na, na, naaa, na, naaa, na, na
Don’t you look at my hedge fund
It’s the only one I got
Not much of a hedge fund
Madoff and his bloody plot
Buy a subprime across the water
Like to own America?
Oregon and California
The bubble turned out to be true
But theres not a lot I can do
Na. na, na, na, natten na, natten na, na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na, natten na, natten na, na, na, na, na
Hey yam, hey yam, hey yam, hey yam,
hey yam, hey yam, hey yam, hey yam
Na, na, naaaa, na, na, naaa, na, naaa, na, na
Hope you enjoyed it, take care and “May the force be with you”